The Link Between Boundaries, Health and Reflexology

For the longest time, I didn’t understand what ‘setting healthy boundaries’ meant. I thought boundaries referred to how other people behaved towards me. In the wellness world, you hear the word boundaries all the time, but maybe like me, you found the concept to be really confusing.

It wasn’t until my teachers taught me that boundaries begin with MY behaviour that it clicked — and I began to set healthy boundaries. And wow, did my world begin to change, personally and professionally.

What Does a Healthy Boundary Look Like?

Here are a few examples of healthy boundaries you should set with yourself…

• Saying no without feeling guilty. (Not always easy, I know)

• Saying yes because you want to, not because you feel you should. (shoulds are a signal to your nervous system that you don’t feel safe, a disconnection from your truth.)

• Telling the truth, even when it may upset someone. (And there will be some people who will be upset, but most won't.)

• Asking for what you need. (So many women in particular — but not exclusively — struggle to ask for what they need, be it more space, more money.)

• Taking care of your body, mind and spirit.

  
  

Once you set healthy personal boundaries, these boundaries will help you prioritise and protect your time, energy, physical health, and emotional space.

Your self-esteem will build, you will feel less stressed and physically better.

When you realise that these boundaries are things you do for you, it’ll be a lot easier to deal with everyone else.

The 5 Main Types of Boundaries

We have different types of boundaries, but here are the 5 main…

• Physical

• Sexual

• Emotional

• Relational

• Spiritual

  
  

Struggling to Create Boundaries? You’re Not Alone

Sounds good, right? But let's be honest — it can be really hard to create boundaries, especially if you have had little or no experience with healthy, loving boundaries.

Let’s start by identifying what poor or leaky boundaries might look like.

Do you struggle with…

• Saying no to things you don’t want to do?

• Telling someone to stop if you don’t like what they are saying or doing?

• Taking care of your own needs?

• Stopping to rest when you need to?

Any of these sounding familiar?

All too often, as women, we struggle to set healthy boundaries. The very idea of saying NO can create feelings of guilt, fear and shame within our mind and body, just for wanting to put our own needs over those of others.

It was a long time before I understood that the word NO was a complete sentence and that

I didn’t always have to explain myself.

Why Is It So Hard to Set Boundaries?

Why do we struggle so much with the idea of setting healthy boundaries for ourselves?

If, as a child, you lived in a house where healthy boundaries were not demonstrated, or society demands that you are a “good” girl, “good” partner and a “good” employee — it is not surprising that so many women struggle to put their own needs front and centre.

Especially if they have experienced their physical boundaries being crossed because of abuse.

“We learn about our boundaries by the way we are treated as children. Then we teach others where our boundaries are by the way we let them treat us. Most people will respect our boundaries if we indicate where they are. With some people, however, we must actively protect them.”— Anne Katherine, Boundaries: Where You Begin And End

How Leaky Boundaries Affect the Body

Having leaky personal boundaries affects us in many different ways.

As a reflexologist, I see many of my clients struggling to create strong boundaries. They may feel as though they are absorbing all the emotions of those around them — leaving them feeling weak, anxious and exhausted. (I know this was something I used to struggle with.)

I take care of so many women who are struggling with feelings of overwhelm and burnout. They are struggling to listen to the messages their bodies are telling them.

They are unhappy, and sometimes unwell, from too many yeses to others and too few to themselves.

Our physical bodies are incredible — they will make many adaptations to keep us lstanding upright — but this is a long way from a true sense of wellness and balance.

Reflexology as a Path to Better Boundaries

The truth is, setting healthy emotional boundaries can feel unfamiliar and even uncomfortable at first — especially if you’ve spent years putting other people’s needs before your own.

But it’s one of the most important things you can do for your emotional and physical wellbeing.

As a reflexologist, I see firsthand how stress and burnout show up in the body. So many of my clients arrive feeling drained, anxious, disconnected — not just from others, but from themselves.

Reflexology for stress and burnout offers a space to pause, reset, and begin listening to what your body really needs.

It’s not just about relaxation (though that’s part of it); it’s a way of coming back into nervous system regulation and internal balance.

Through regular reflexology treatments, clients often become more aware of their own boundaries — when they’re being crossed, and what they need to feel safe and well.

It helps them tune into their inner signals again. And from there, it becomes easier to say no, to rest, to choose differently.

Final Thought: Healing Through Healthy Boundaries

Boundaries are something we practise — and reflexology can be one of the gentle, supportive tools that helps guide that process.

Because when you start to take care of yourself in a real, consistent way, everything begins to shift.

You feel stronger, clearer, and more connected to who you really are. And that’s where healing truly begins.

---

Helen provides reflexology in central Norwich   Helen Pinnock -Reflexology Norwich

Reflexology is a gentle and non-invasive treatment that offers your body and mind the opportunity to relax, restore and rejuvenate. By receiving regular treatments you are supporting your own wellbeing both physically and emotionally.